Another Conundrum (my word of the month)

Why is it that no decision can be easy for me. I have been working at my current place of buisness for almost 2 years, and since I have been back in Michigan for almost a year I have been wanting to get out of the store I am in. I don't love working there, I don't like working there, I think I hate working there most days. My boss is very hard to work for. There are too many reasons to even explain.
I have been wanting to move up in the company and a few weeks ago an opportunity came up in another store. One that I know I would like working in. I applied and had my interview yesterday. Last week one of my managers, my favorite manager quit. It totally sucks, I feel like the rug has been pulled from under me. So now there is one open manager position. I am the "favorite" for this position, my manager keeps bugging me atleast 3 times a day to apply.
So here comes the challenging decision. Do I apply for this position also? I really want to get out of my store, but I have no idea if I will get hired at the other store. I don't know how many people he is interviewing and who my competition is. I know a little but not enough to feel confident that it is in the bag. Then if I interview at my store, I have to be interviewed by the district manager for both jobs if the general manager likes me for the position. Both stores are in the same district, meaning the same district manager will interview me for both positions, and this is the scary part. What if he picks where I go?
Then if I don't apply at the store I am at now I might be stuck in the position I am in now. And I know I will have to do more work, because no one else in the store knows how to do what I do and what the manager who is leaving does now.
Try figuring this one out, ahhh! Well I have been praying my little head off. I am not sure what I will do. I have to come up with something to say to my boss on Tuesday when he asks me for the 900 th time where my resume is and how he would like to set up an interview.
Me and my conundrums, why can't they ever be like, which color Porche should I get, midnight blue or candy apple red, oh the choices! I could handle that, well maybe but then I would have to decide which friend could drive with me and that would be hard, cause I love you all!

Great Expectations

Do you ever expect too much out of something, and then later realize it was wonderful. Why is it in the moment we can think that this relationship, job, or whatever the experience may be needs this or that. We think it isn't near perfect and can and sometimes must get better. Time passes and that relationship, job, or whatever the experience is over and we miss it so much and all we can think of is how great it was.
This has happened to me more than once, I must admit. The most recent experience has made me wonder why I feel this way. The questions that I have been asking myself are 1. Do I miss this, okay in this incident it's a relationship, do I miss this relationship because I don't have a relationship similar to it now? Which is a very valid question. I don't have a relationship like it, not even close. But when I start thinking of what this relationship had compared to others, I only think of the good, fun stuff.
2. Was this relationship great, and I took advantage of it? I know that some of this is true. But why is it when I am with this person I love what we have but am fine with the minimal friendship and am never really sure that it needs to be more. Then when I am away from this person, I think "stupid you, look what you are missing?"
So as you can see I have a little conundrum here. Sometimes I think I just miss this amazing friendship with this person, and it was never meant to be anything more, but since I am not dating anyone I wonder if I am missing something. And then maybe I have expectations of what should be and those are just unrealistic.
I am not sure and really only time will tell. I do miss this person and although we are still great friends, I miss him being near. And who knows he may be a lifetime great friend at the least and some people never get that, so I am super lucky, and maybe he is more. But I do know I will be more greatful for the great friend he is now.

45th parallel

This weekend I drove up to beautiful scenic Michigan, and on the way I noticed that I was in the middle of the earth, literally. That was so odd. I passed one of the many markers in Michigan letting me know that I was at the 45th parallel, meaning I was half way between the equator and north pole. Over the weekend I saw so many beautiful sights, Lake Michigan, beautiful Harbor Springs, great friends, fireworks, and yet for some reason a sign telling me that I was in the middle of the earth was one of the wow moments for me.
As I begin to wonder why it so spectacular to me, I start to think that being in the middle of something just feels special. When you are in the middle that means you are committed, involved, their is no easy way out. When you are in the middle of something, you most likely are on a journey from one side to the other. When you are in the middle of something, there is a feeling of accomplishment, but you still have goals to go further. I believe this is where I am in my life, right in the middle. At the point I drove pass the sign telling me I was in the middle of the earth, I remember saying out loud to myself "Now ain't that the truth" but I was thinking about my life.
For a while being in the middle has been uncomfortable, sometimes I feel stuck "right in the middle." But as I saw that sign and thought about where I am in life I realized that I am in the center of life. Sometimes it is challenging, but there are so many rewards like a beautiful view over Lake Michigan. The center is never easy to get to, and it isn't always easy to get pass, but I am finally glad to be there.
As I drove by the sign, I wanted to slow down, I wanted to look around and take it all in. The state of Michigan considers the 135 miles of the Michigan Polar-Equator Trail as a significant tourist attraction in Michigan. I also am beginning to slow down and enjoy all of the scenic routes along life and enjoy being in the center.